I told you to be patient
I told you to be fine
In the morning I'll be with you
But it'll be a different kind
I'll be holding all the tickets,
and you'll be holding all
the fines.
I told you to be fine
In the morning I'll be with you
But it'll be a different kind
I'll be holding all the tickets,
and you'll be holding all
the fines.
I'm tired and I don't have that much to say. But, alas, I promised a blog!
S is coming tomorrow, and I'm not quite sure I believe it. I mean, I believe it. But until I see her set foot on campus I'll think reality is playing tricks on me. One of those painfully amazing "really?" scenarios.
Despite having the makings of a bad day I'm pretty satisfied. Here, in my spinning chair, with Jasmine tea from the hall social. I have some pretty awesome suite mates.
And a tea genius RA who has magical blooming tea flowers that I want to make an art project out of. I suppose when I get the money I can acquire some from target and get started on that. My mainstream tea boxes made me want to bang my head on the table with embarrassment, haha.
I managed to forget an entire week. Amazing I know. Full of Hannah potential this time, guys. I was so set on doing homework early today, and turning it in before friday. BUT. That's not possible. Why? Dear reader, because. Because it was due last friday.
Lab was good today, though I feel as if I drew all of the constellations in existence. And then lecture with MF which was surprisingly pleasant and warm. I'm excited about the zine, I have a lot to choose from regarding submissions. Maybe I'll write something specifically for it. Meh.
Writing isn't doing anything for me presently. So here's something I wrote awhile ago. But I'm feeling it tonight.
S is coming tomorrow, and I'm not quite sure I believe it. I mean, I believe it. But until I see her set foot on campus I'll think reality is playing tricks on me. One of those painfully amazing "really?" scenarios.
Despite having the makings of a bad day I'm pretty satisfied. Here, in my spinning chair, with Jasmine tea from the hall social. I have some pretty awesome suite mates.
And a tea genius RA who has magical blooming tea flowers that I want to make an art project out of. I suppose when I get the money I can acquire some from target and get started on that. My mainstream tea boxes made me want to bang my head on the table with embarrassment, haha.
I managed to forget an entire week. Amazing I know. Full of Hannah potential this time, guys. I was so set on doing homework early today, and turning it in before friday. BUT. That's not possible. Why? Dear reader, because. Because it was due last friday.
Lab was good today, though I feel as if I drew all of the constellations in existence. And then lecture with MF which was surprisingly pleasant and warm. I'm excited about the zine, I have a lot to choose from regarding submissions. Maybe I'll write something specifically for it. Meh.
Writing isn't doing anything for me presently. So here's something I wrote awhile ago. But I'm feeling it tonight.
Fiebre de la Tierra
My shirt felt like it was melting into my skin. Every inch of my body was drenched with sweat, beads of water dripped down my temples, collecting and falling from my face. I was laying on top of the earth. It smelled damp, my sweat seeping into it. Feeding it. And suddenly, I was freezing.
Leaves holding water caked my forehead. Slimy like fish. They slid off when my skin made them too warm. Then another fish would find its way against my skin. Cold, fresh, renewed.
Women speaking in Shuar stumbled around me, their tones full of earnest worry. Words floated in the air. Words I couldn't understand.
I closed my eyes, the room was too bright. The sun pierced my skin, burning my flesh. It felt like needles, pricking at my cold skin.
I opened them again, saw the moon through the hut window.
Leah, sat beside me, replaced the leaves on my head. My vision was blurry. I made out her silhouette, her full curls momentarily blocking out the moon.
The stench of old chicken made my stomach churn. Heave. I clutched the cool earth underneath me, hoping that soon it would stop spinning.
"Emma, Emma if you can hear me. We are getting you to a doctor soon. You have a very high fever..."
I closed my eyes. Closed my nose, the smell was too much. I heard my brain fizzle. The fever was frying me. I was still so cold.
I opened my eyes. I was on a horse, gripping a wooden saddle with all the strength I could muster. Ahead of me was a Shuar village man. Cut, Cut, Cutting. His machete chopping down the Amazon so we could make a path. The horse drove forward, leaves and branches slapping me. Attacking me with broad strokes. They felt like paddles slamming against my skin. Relentless. One after another.
I looked down, saw Leah walking beside me, holding my leg. I hadn’t noticed the pressure there.
She looked up, smiled grimly at me, and said: “Em, it’s only a little bit longer, stay on the horse for just a while longer.”
I closed my eyes. The rocking of the horse made my stomach churn. Heave. I could feel the bruises growing from the saddle. I thought that if they got too big they would swallow me whole.
I opened my eyes, I was in a bed. In a sterile room. A huge wooden cross hung against the wall in front of me. A blonde woman reached over me, making a cross in the air. There was a rosary flying in front of my face. Jesus was staring at me from his cross. I didn't understand. I thought that if you cut off the top of the cross, all that would remain would be a T. Just another symbol. Although that's all the cross is anyway.
The woman closed her eyes, pressed her hands together.
"Dear Lord, oh merciful one, save this child. Save this child from death. Lead her back into the light of the world. Save her, Lord! Rid her of the devil!"
I laughed, the cold reaching my skin. I pulled up covers, only to find fire spreading over my skin. I was burning, burning. I threw off the white pristine sheets. Closed my eyes, closed my ears. The Lord was not my doctor.
I felt the wind against my face, I was lifted onto a stretcher. Lifted up.
I opened my eyes. I was in Heaven, looking out over the world. Flying up, higher, higher, higher still.
I closed my eyes, the road to Heaven was making me dizzy.
My shirt felt like it was melting into my skin. Every inch of my body was drenched with sweat, beads of water dripped down my temples, collecting and falling from my face. I was laying on top of the earth. It smelled damp, my sweat seeping into it. Feeding it. And suddenly, I was freezing.
Leaves holding water caked my forehead. Slimy like fish. They slid off when my skin made them too warm. Then another fish would find its way against my skin. Cold, fresh, renewed.
Women speaking in Shuar stumbled around me, their tones full of earnest worry. Words floated in the air. Words I couldn't understand.
I closed my eyes, the room was too bright. The sun pierced my skin, burning my flesh. It felt like needles, pricking at my cold skin.
I opened them again, saw the moon through the hut window.
Leah, sat beside me, replaced the leaves on my head. My vision was blurry. I made out her silhouette, her full curls momentarily blocking out the moon.
The stench of old chicken made my stomach churn. Heave. I clutched the cool earth underneath me, hoping that soon it would stop spinning.
"Emma, Emma if you can hear me. We are getting you to a doctor soon. You have a very high fever..."
I closed my eyes. Closed my nose, the smell was too much. I heard my brain fizzle. The fever was frying me. I was still so cold.
I opened my eyes. I was on a horse, gripping a wooden saddle with all the strength I could muster. Ahead of me was a Shuar village man. Cut, Cut, Cutting. His machete chopping down the Amazon so we could make a path. The horse drove forward, leaves and branches slapping me. Attacking me with broad strokes. They felt like paddles slamming against my skin. Relentless. One after another.
I looked down, saw Leah walking beside me, holding my leg. I hadn’t noticed the pressure there.
She looked up, smiled grimly at me, and said: “Em, it’s only a little bit longer, stay on the horse for just a while longer.”
I closed my eyes. The rocking of the horse made my stomach churn. Heave. I could feel the bruises growing from the saddle. I thought that if they got too big they would swallow me whole.
I opened my eyes, I was in a bed. In a sterile room. A huge wooden cross hung against the wall in front of me. A blonde woman reached over me, making a cross in the air. There was a rosary flying in front of my face. Jesus was staring at me from his cross. I didn't understand. I thought that if you cut off the top of the cross, all that would remain would be a T. Just another symbol. Although that's all the cross is anyway.
The woman closed her eyes, pressed her hands together.
"Dear Lord, oh merciful one, save this child. Save this child from death. Lead her back into the light of the world. Save her, Lord! Rid her of the devil!"
I laughed, the cold reaching my skin. I pulled up covers, only to find fire spreading over my skin. I was burning, burning. I threw off the white pristine sheets. Closed my eyes, closed my ears. The Lord was not my doctor.
I felt the wind against my face, I was lifted onto a stretcher. Lifted up.
I opened my eyes. I was in Heaven, looking out over the world. Flying up, higher, higher, higher still.
I closed my eyes, the road to Heaven was making me dizzy.
1 comments:
I remember you reading that to me before, but I liked reading it because I didnt see the format last time. It's a very lovely piece!
Post a Comment